A young man expresses his admiration for a girl in his class and quickly proposes to her without prior communication. The girl's family conducts a consultation (khira) and the outcome is not favorable, although they acknowledge the young man as a good person. The girl wants to pursue the relationship despite the unfavorable outcome. The young man seeks guidance on whether the girl is obligated to obey her family's decision and if they should wait for a resolution.
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1 Answer
Peace be upon you and God's mercy and blessings.
Ayatollah Khamenei and Ayatollah Sistani (may God protect them):
Regardless of what you or the girl perceive about your suitability for each other, the family may have reasons to believe that you are not suitable for their daughter, not necessarily because you are a bad person, but perhaps due to personality differences or other reasons. Therefore, the only solution is for both of you to be patient and try to convince her family through your own family or a community leader.
Regarding the consultation in marriage, you can refer to the links 640 and 156.
As for the father's permission in the marriage of a virgin girl, you can refer to the link 7380.
May you be successful in all good things.