A woman is contemplating rejecting a marriage proposal from a man who is less educated and financially stable than she is. She is pursuing a master's degree while he has not completed his education. Although he is religiously committed and has good character, she struggles to accept his job and financial situation.
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1 Answer
Peace be upon you.
Ayatollah Khamenei and Ayatollah Sistani (may Allah protect them):
The hadith mentioned does not imply that it is forbidden for a woman to reject any believer who proposes marriage to her. Rather, it emphasizes that when a woman considers accepting a proposal, she should take into account the man's faith and character, as these are the foundations of marriage. A faithful person is less likely to engage in wrongdoing or harm, and thus, the basis for acceptance should be faith and morals, not wealth or worldly matters. However, this does not mean it is forbidden to reject a proposal if the rejection is based on rational reasons, such as the woman feeling unable to cope with the man's social life or difficulties in sharing a life together, which could lead to problems or even divorce later on.
In conclusion, it is not forbidden for a woman to reject a suitor, even if her rejection is based on financial or worldly matters. However, she should strive to ensure that her rejection is not solely due to a lack of wealth or embarrassment about his job, as long as his work is respectable and lawful.
May you be successful in all good.
Source:
Ayatollah Khamenei (may Allah protect him): Tahrir al-Wasilah, Marriage, Some of Its Etiquettes and Laws
Ayatollah Sistani (may Allah protect him): Minhaj al-Salihin, Vol. 3, Book of Marriage, Its Recommendation and Some of Its Etiquettes and Laws