If I visit a friend's house, do I need to ask the head of the household (my friend's father) for permission to use the water for ablution or to eat from the hospitality my friend offers?
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1 Answer
Peace be upon you and God's mercy and blessings.
Grand Ayatollah Sayyid Sistani (may God protect him):
It is permissible for a person to eat - even without necessity - from the homes of those mentioned in the noble verse of Surah An-Nur, which includes: fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts, maternal and paternal uncles and aunts. It is also permissible for someone who is a representative of a household, entrusted with its affairs and preservation, to eat from the house of their client, as indicated by the phrase ﴿أَوْ مَا مَلَكْتُمْ مَفَاتِحَهُ﴾ in that noble verse. Likewise, a friend may eat from their friend's house, and a wife from her husband's house, and parents from their child's house.
However, eating from these homes is only permissible if one does not know of the owner's dislike; thus, the distinction lies in the fact that the permission to eat from these homes does not depend on obtaining the owner's consent or satisfaction, and it is allowed even in cases of doubt or even suspicion of absence of dislike, unlike other homes.
It is advisable to limit this ruling to what is commonly eaten, such as bread, dates, condiments, fruits, and vegetables, rather than rare foods that are usually reserved for special occasions and esteemed guests.
This ruling also applies to common beverages such as water, buttermilk, and milk. However, it does not extend to the homes of others or to their shops and gardens, and it is limited to what is available in the house, not extending to items purchased from outside with money taken from the house.
Source: Minhaj al-Salihin, Vol. 3, Book of Foods and Drinks, Chapter Two on Non-Animals, 942
Grand Ayatollah Sayyid Khamenei (may God protect him):
It is permissible for a person to eat - even without necessity - from the homes of parents, children, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, maternal and paternal uncles and aunts, and friends; likewise, a wife from her husband's house; and it is also permissible for someone who is a representative of a household, entrusted with its affairs and preservation, to eat from the house of their client. Eating from these homes is only permissible if one does not know of the owner's dislike; thus, the distinction lies in the fact that the permission to eat from these homes does not depend on obtaining the owner's consent or satisfaction, and it is allowed even in cases of doubt or even suspicion of absence of dislike, although it is better to exercise caution, especially in cases of predominance. It is advisable to limit this ruling to what is commonly eaten, such as bread, dates, condiments, fruits, and similar items, rather than rare foods that are usually reserved for special occasions and esteemed guests. It appears that this ruling extends to common beverages such as buttermilk and milk. However, it does not extend to the homes of others or to their shops and gardens, and it is limited to what is available in the house, not extending to items purchased from outside with money taken from the house.
Source: Tahrir al-Wasilah, Foods and Drinks, Regarding Non-Animals, M 29
May you be successful in all good.